Food for thought: Staying positive

Staying positive in Puerto Rico requires discipline. So tired of people re-posting news. Let's break the addiction. 

Hello lover, it's been a while ( 4 years to be exact)

Hi lover. It's been a while. Four years to be exact. So many has happened. So let's get started on updates. Carmela is still with me. Loyal to the end and still owns my bed. Weiner dog love is the best. Mia, my niece, the best thing my sister has ever done, is almost taller than her mom (she's 9) and a loving child. Tania is still thriving and recently got married after five years of pure bliss. I have to additions to my life, my half sisters R&F. Both so loving and well grounded. F is 14 year with huge model features and height. I had a small panic attack when at last year's EDC a friend asked me about her. Yes, I'm keeping her close. We bond over EDM, reading and Starbucks. She insists I'm her favorite spirit animal which I gladly accept considering her massive Instagram and Tumbler following. And here I thought I was cooler. R keeps surprising me with her discipline and work ethic. At 24, she works in a Big Four while burying herself for the CPA. Parental units are great. Dad hit the 5 year cancer free milestone. Funny how cancer can change you for the better. He's a true example of that. Mom still married, still devoted to the kitchen, to Mia, God and living life to the fullest. 

As for me. Changes, changes and more changes. On the friend side, the ones who were my best friends, they no longer are. But I keep the faith that we will cross paths again. New friends have arrived in many shapes and forms. I have to say I'm f***ing blessed to have an amazing support system. In 2013, I started running and did my first half marathon and dropped a whopping 30 pounds in 16 weeks. Did Miami Half in 2014 with busted hamstrings and quietly quit for a bit. I'm still very active, but I have a personal goal to being at my fittest by 40. That is in 18 months. YIKES!!!!

On love, after dating with some very questionable individuals with flawed character, I found myself in love with an unexpected individual. No, not a girl but a guy 15 years my junior. Trust me, that is the last thing I expected to happen. And although is very complex thing to describe, understand or simply get, I'm happy I opened my heart to simply feel and love without judgement. Currently, I feel we are on a break, but the emotional attachment ( co-dependence?) is there. It an overwhelming place to be, trust me.  We have no idea what will happen, but I only know one thing: we both want true happiness and success for each other.  More on that later. 

Career wise, I'm at a crossroads. At 38 1/2 I have no idea how I'm going to spend the next 20 years. After a successful 5 year run as a non profit Executive Director, I quit due to burn out. Without another job, plan or idea on what to do. And even though it was a rash decision, it was a sanity saver. I had an amazing run, a true school, but soul draining as well.  I landed a few clients and worked in a consulting firm for 6 months. Again, other stuff happened and i'm happy to report I'm still standing. My friend Laura, a wise, wise friend, told me I have been giving birth for the past year. Growth is necessary but draining as well if you don't keep yourself in check. 

I only know that even though I have no idea what will happen.  I just know that every challenge is a temporary and that I'll be fine.  Not fine, amazing. Life has taught me that. 

I'm so into you

Pierre Hardy for Gap wedges (picture by the style rookie)

The need of balance

I've been a wreck lately. I have forgotten about myself. I started a new challenge and the challenge has taken me. Ive been sick, exhausted, drained but I'm proud to report that I'm still standing. . 

So back to the drawing board. I promise myself to eat properly, I promise myself to exercise and get skinny once and for all, I promise myself to make time for my friends, I promise myself to stay true to all the things I strongly believe.

So the word of the week is... balance

Friday

Mood:ready to get home (@ Dallas)
Current Obsessions: personalizing my new office

Currently reading: Leadership form the Inside Out by Kevin Cashman

Currently listening:Carry-ons ( I'm at DFW airport)
Upcoming events:Carmela time, cleaning, hopefully time with the J-Go

Genius

"New Jersey, would you stop embarrassing me?! I know you're New York's chunkier, uglier, sluttier sister but pull yourself together, girl." — Chelsea Handler

The big news

I've been quiet. not because of lack of inspiration, on the contrary, I'm so excited I sometimes can't sleep. So he big news.... I got a new job. Three years ago I would have sold my firstborn for one. But the Guy Upstairs had a different road for me, one that included healing, forgiving and learning. 

I certainly wasn't looking for it, but the opportunity found me. I won't say much about what exactly I'm going to do, but involves the words non-profit, health awareness and education. It's another level. 

I see as the reward for taking charge of my own healing, destiny and learning not to compromise my limits and respecting myself.My heart is overjoyed with gratitude...

Priceless

Doggy treats:$5.00

Dog food:$15.00

Wee wee pads:$10.00

Finding my dog's favorite lost toy at the pet shop: Priceless

Climbing the Chinese Wall

Hopefully delayed gratification will have its reward...It's been a while now

An the winner is...

Miss Cameron Diaz in Oscar de la Renta. Old Hollywood glamour mixed with her usual easy going smile.Love the red
Runner up:Miley Cirus (wrong for her age, perfect for me with 30 lbs less)

Gaga in Wonderland

A great spoof on Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland starring the amazing Lagy Gaga. Click here for some laughs

Buy my love-Jack Vartanian cuffs

I'm ripping this one out of Rachel Zoe's daily feed. If you $4,800 to spare and want to really own my heart, THIS is your cue.

xo

Pissed (well kinda)

By now, everybody knows I have a serious crush on Russell Brand. I haven't publicly acknowledged that I'm pissed that he got engaged to Katy Perry. But she's cool and what not and I'm not that mad anymore.

So she confirmed what I have known all along. Rusty is a genius and now a better person because he apparently swapped sex addiction to hot monogamy (yes,people it can happen). She says:

"Love has really affected [my songwriting]. I know how to handle a man now. So it's talking about the love rather than, you know, being annoyed with boys. He's like Jim Morrison meets Charles Manson meets Jesus meets a little bit of Elvis. He's a walking genius. Just standing next to him makes me smarter. He's good for me. He's not a pussy in any way, shape or form. He's the boss; he calls the shots. But I like that. I've been waiting for someone I couldn't steamroll."

If I could only make them break apart...

Monday

Mood:distracted
Current Obsessions: decluttering
Currently reading: ADD Friendly ways to organize your life by Kolberg & Nadeau

Currently listening:Cello Concerto in D Minor
Upcoming events:beach,Jenni's bday (10th! a day late) Ecliptica 10th anniversary show, LA

Look of the day- Olivia, lovely as always

I'm having improper thoughts-love the clutch